CONTEST ENTRY: "He is a confidence man ... THANK GOODNESS!

[write-light.livejournal.com]

From BOAC (which I've flown!, good lord, how old AM I?) aka the British Overseas Airways Corporation (later, British Airways), 1959

*hilarious sudden twist headline
*odd hand positions
*lady in 2A's hair is on fire?
*this is not steerage, I gather, but "de LUXE"
*charming, charming ageism
*ellipses are... overused ... and where dashes would be better ... sometimes in the wrong place too.

My favorite line: "Frankly, we ourselves don't know quite how."



Click to see 800x1034 version.  A much larger version (2048 x 2864) can be found HERE on Flickr.

Comments

[fishstickmarie.livejournal.com]

Yes. And all I can think is "flew into Miami Beach BOAC..."

[write-light.livejournal.com]

"flew in FROM Miami Beach BOAC" You had me looking up air crashes ;)

[baron154.livejournal.com]

"British cabin service gives you confidence. Only BOAC can give you British cabin service."

Is that a tautology? Or a koan? I find it makes me want to fly BOAC. I need to be coddled on my transatlantic flight, next to my armrest ashtray. Because I'm a nervy old dame in pearls, prone to make a scene at any time. I need real British cabin service to calm me down and administer the hypo like a gentleman would. Gently, softly. Perhaps with a kiss..

[baron154.livejournal.com]

Seriously, I'm a terror, afraid of heights, oceans, closed spaces, and foreigners, and on this flight I will make you all share my nightmare, God never meant us to fly!! Do you all hear me?? I need a handsome steward, and frankly this martini isn't//

[baron154.livejournal.com]

-^% Static.. end transmission from that doomed 1959 flight..*(( "..well I don't care about turbulence, I don't see why you can't just do your job and refresh my .."$%^& (static hiss...)

end transmission

[write-light.livejournal.com]

LOLOLOL I wondered how far you'd go with that. That first line is actually as simple logical statement: B leads to C and A leads to B, so A leads to C. :D

[hannahsarah.livejournal.com]

Probably 100 crossings? Wow, at the rate of a flight a day... well ... that's a few months of experience ... sign me up!

I feel more confident already.

[http://users.livejournal.com/_nicolai_/]

Downroute rest arrangements were... more generous in those days.
As can be seen in the arrangements that the longer-serving BA staff enjoy compared to those of US-based carriers, and a few of those BA staff date back to BOAC days (or near then).

[bzul.livejournal.com]

Each steward is a generous and accomplished dance partner, and our guarantee is that no unescorted dowager will complete the transatlantic crossing without being asked to take a turn in the dance aisle.

[loreamara.livejournal.com]

The dance aisle, lol.

[loreamara.livejournal.com]

"He or she can spot you immediately, if you're the least bit tense."

They can smell your fear. And they always go for the weakest of the pack.

Also, yes.

[write-light.livejournal.com]

LOL XD

[pikkewyntjie.livejournal.com]

Her Harry died many years ago and he was never that great in bed to begin with, so when the suave steward suggested they sneak off to the lav for some "British cabin service" she knew she would accept the offer, but didn't want to appear too eager.

Of course, she discovered he was a "confidence man" in more than one sense of the word when she noticed her jewelry was missing, but it didn't bother her too much. "Well, an old bat like me can't expect to get it for free," she mused.

[write-light.livejournal.com]

LOLing and I can't explain it to the people I'm with, nor can I seem to stop.

[pikkewyntjie.livejournal.com]

I hate it when I'm in that situation, which happens all the time especially with my husband. His sense of humor and mine are very different. I don't even try anymore.

Airplane...

[jckmnpa.livejournal.com]

All I can think of when I see that woman is "Yes stewardess, I speak Jive"...LOL

Re: Airplane...

[write-light.livejournal.com]

Cut me some slack, Jack! Chump don' want no help, chump don't GET da' help! Jive ass dude don't got no brains anyhow! Hmmph!